State of the Nation: Morality and Indian woman's mind

TOO MANY OPTIONS: Sexual desire is no scandal but live-in relationship is no, no for Indian women.

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Vasudev saw no correlation between pre-martial sex and marriage. “Financial independence is changing women’s choices. Morality works when it is a voluntary choice—when it is enforced, the enforcer is amoral,” she said.

Caste, religion and marriage

Forty six per cent women support a ban on inter-caste marriage while 50 per cent women support a ban on inter-religious marriages. Is that a very orthodox conservative women that we are seeing emerging in the 21st century where we are not questioning family, we are not questioning inter-religious marriage, we prefer caste marriage - so there is no ideological rebellion left at all in the Indian women.

Replying to the question Advani said, “Talking about it myself personally I married to a Gujarati man and I see nothing wrong with an inter-caste marriage but I do see things not very comfortable with an inter-religious marriage. I would personally not be comfortable marrying a non-Hindu because I have been brought up in a Hindu family. But that’s a matter of personal choice. That’s a matter for an individual’s choice and best left to the individual.”

Vasudev was of the same opinion that the issue of inter-religion marriage is individual’s personal choice. Echoing the same view she said, “I would have to chose the religion there. The moral codes of the two religions’ are different definitely for women. If one tries to imagine one’s life as a Muslim woman after marriage I find it tough. I would not marry a Muslim man.”

However, Dawesar said that it depends on the religious value of couples, which will determine if they are ready for inter-religion marriage. If two people are not particularly religious and do not have those close religious ties in their social circle, they can probably go through it. Talking about her getting married to a religious man she said, “I will be uncomfortable with anyone of any religion including my own religion who is deeply religious because I am not religious.”

Women are saying we don’t want to marry outside our religion, we don’t want to marry outside our caste.

Kakkar opined,” I don’t know if they are modern. I am extremely tradition in my own value systems. But I believe that two individuals should be allowed to chose their life partners not on the basis of religion or because of the caste, but because they are compatible. They should rise above those interest and the marriage eventually is between two peoples - its not between the caste, its between the families because they don’t live in joint family anymore.”

Isn’t the Indian view of marriage much more pragmatic materialist one. It’s not necessarily about rebellion, emotional or romantic choices they are very pragmatic material choice.